It starts off small. Just a glimmer, a twinkle. Then it grows into something that consumes your every waking moment, and some of the not-waking moments. "What is it?" you ask. I'll tell you.
It's imaginary pregnancy symptoms. It starts when I change into my jammies, which involves removing my bra. I then run into the livingroom so that I can continue playing on the new! XBOX before Husband logs me off. I notice that the motion of my breasts against my sleep top didn't feel so good. I don't think, "oh, I shouldn't run without a bra on", or "my breasts are more sensitive right after I take off my bra". Oh no, both of those thoughts would have been wrought with reason and rationality. No, I think, "Ohmigosh, I'm pregnant." Notice there is no maybe in that thought.
Sometimes there's nothing worse than hope.
Except for the total lack of it, of course. Life is a paradox.
I'm peeing on a stick tomorrow. Okay, fine! I'll probably pee on several sticks tomorrow because I'm a sick human being who has no self control.
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