Sunday, March 29

How to annoy the IT girl

***Yes, I'm now reading Dooce and she does a lot of the how to annoy posts. I like to copy other bloggers.***

***She also uses the asterisks like this***

  1. Call me the IT girl. I'm in my thirties. I own a house, three vehicles, a 401k, a roth IRA and a time share in Barbados (hint: I'm lying about one of these things). I have a BS and part of a Master's degree. I vote and base that vote on information I got from somewhere other than SNL. I am not a "girl." Also, I have a name. Try using it!
  2. Tell me you are getting an error when you try to [fill in the blank], but don't tell me what the error actually says. This one gets me every time.
  3. Tell me you are getting an error when you, in fact, are getting a message that you need to read. Here is an example of how this goes:

    user: I'm getting an error when I try to send email.
    IT girl: What's the error say? (notice how this user doesn't tell me what the error is either)
    user: Something about my mailbox being full?
    IT girl: You need to delete or archive some email. Your mailbox is full you freaking moron! In the future please use the ocular devices you have in your head to read the "error" then parse it using your tiny brain before you call me! These "error messages" are in your native language!
  4. Call me at 3 a.m. to tell me your email isn't working. Then do not return any of my calls for two days and call my boss to tell him your email isn't working.
  5. Wait until you are in Romania to try using your VPN to connect to our network and discover that you don't know your PIN. This results in another 3 a.m. phone call with panic thrown into the mix. I know testing before you go requires a small amount of foresight, but try to think ahead. Please.
  6. Tell me you can't log onto the server. As if we just have the one. Then when I ask you if you are trying to connect to xyz server, you tell me yes, even though you aren't. What you mean to say is "I don't know because I'm a moron." I do not like having to leave my office, jay walk across the street of death and angry drivers, go up 27 floors to your desk to look at your screen and say, "Hmm, that doesn't say xyz server. That says abc server."
  7. Accusingly tell me your laptop is running slow, you need me to fix it but you can't ever leave your laptop with me because you need it every second of your ineffective day. And copy your manager on the email. I've got news for you. You. are. not. that. important. If you are unable to effectively do your job while being without your laptop for one hour out of one day, then you are not qualified to do your job. You are a work martyr who tries to make up for lack of ingenuity and focus by acting as though you are always working. I call these people George Costanzas.
Ahhhh! I feel better. Refreshed. And I do want to say that I like my users. They are really a pretty cool set of people.

Friday, March 27

More about hail

Turns out the breaking noises I kept hearing were people's windshields in their cars that were parked on the street. Imagine what happened to the people who were driving into the hail going 30mph. There are a lot of tarp covered vehicles in my neighborhood now. We also got a cracked windshield on the car we have parked on the street. We were going to donate it anyway; we just hadn't gotten around to it yet.

We might curse the leaves the that come off our huge oak, but that oak saved our vehicles. Of course, our two-car garage could've saved our vehicles as well. :/

Wednesday, March 25

Time for a new roof

As I've touched on many times, I like weather, even when weather doesn't like me back. We had a bit of a hail storm after we got home from work today. Luckily Husband checked the weather before we left work so we knew some bad weather was headed our way. In Texas bad weather always has the possibility of hail and/or tornadoes. Heck, even good weather has the possibility of hail and tornadoes. Weather here is fickle and unpredictable sometimes. We had left the dogs outside today so I was very antsy to get home and get them inside. They don't really have any shelter out there. We knew they might get a little rained on; but we hadn't bargained for hail.

Anyway, the hail started about 20 minutes after we got home. Dogs are safe and fine. Husband and I stood on the front porch for most of the storm and said things along the lines of "gawally! woodja lookit that". At one point, I did recommend we go inside and get into one of the rooms that has another room above it. It sounded like the hail was going to come through. It also sounded like a lot of breaking going on. Luckily, I think it was only the hail breaking.

I did get hit by some hail pieces that flew up from the hail hitting the sidewalk. I then got hit by smaller pieces of hail as I ran out to get the bigger pieces of hail for the pictures. Bingo had to wiggle past one of my legs in order to get one of those pieces of hail in her mouth. After that, she was fine. Sometimes I feel like she is my toddler in that she identifies things with her mouth. Kaya is so totally my teenager. I think I've even seen her roll her eyes.

Here are some pictures of the hail. And yes, you get to see part of my face. Be glad I'm showing you this one where my crazy eyes were covered up. I get some crazy looking eyes sometimes.

Holy criminy! Did you ever know someone could write so much about one hail storm?


This is the hail on our deck. My poor little plants.

These were not the largest ones that came down. The largest ones busted up as soon as they hit. These all had a little nucleus that was whiter and more dense.

Our neighbor's lawn looked really neat with all the white on the green green perfect perfect lawn they have. They are better people than we are.

And now, the one you've all been waiting for...

Monday, March 23

And now we're home

We went to Arlington this weekend. It was fun. Good friends, good food, fun. We got back last night. So nice to be home.

I've come to a realization about pregnancy. Despite the fact that we've been trying for a year and a half and despite the fact that I've been planning for a little over two years, I have a sneaking suspicion that whenever we do finally conceive, I'll feel like we aren't ready. I'll think there is something that we should've done before getting pregnant that we haven't done yet. I'll think we should've waited until we got the carpet replaced with tile, or that wall between the dining room and kitchen removed, or bought a new house, or ran a half-marathon, or learned how to give myself a pedicure. The list goes on.

In other news, I've also come to the realization that I think I require far more leisure time than I really do. This leads to a lot of crap not getting done. How much leisure time is reasonable? One hour before bed?

I need answers, people!

Wednesday, March 18

Needs salt

I don't know what to write. I've been reading other blogs. I've got nothing going on. Work is work. Same same. House is house. Same same. There's nothing different. There is nothing new under the sun. That's a quote from Proverbs, I believe.

I went to see T.Lo last night. Their baby is still unbelievably cute. I'm hoping that she gets pregnant with her second baby around the time we get pregnant with our first. Who knows. Anything is possible, I suppose.

I'm not feeling particularly positive right now. I'm not feeling negative either. I'm just neutral. Blah. I'm neither hot nor cold.

I'm also tired. It's only 8 p.m. and I feel like I could go to sleep. This isn't unusual. I have nights like this. At the risk of sounding like a broken record, I really need to start exercising.

This is such a bland post.

Monday, March 16

TTC: Update

I'm now on day 1 of my cycle. Meaning I got my period this morning. For most ttc'ers, this is the kiss of death. However, I like to look on the positive side. This is the shortest cycle I've had in a very long time. I ovulated on day 14 and my cycle was only 32 days long. Shorter than my 35 day cycles and way shorter than my 70 day cycles.

Goal for this cycle: exercise

****The following is graphic and gross****

So my menses are bright red today! Let me explain why that's good and why I'm so happy about it I'm posting about the consistency and color of my mense. For the last year or so, my menses have been mostly dark red and not very liquid, mostly gooey (sorry! so gross). Then they would just get clotty. This is indicative of old blood. Stagnation. Not what you want in your uterus. The fact that my menses are bright red is a sign of health. :)

Sunday, March 15

More about less of my hair

I'm not sure the no shampoo is going to work out for me. I got my hair cut on Friday and it was shampooed. It feels so soft and silky! I think I'm going to have to go back to my old hair shampooing ways. I might give the no-poo a try again at a later date.

I've been in Austin for close to seven years now. In this seven years I had yet to find my stylist. That person who knows just what to do with my hair to make it work for who I am. (notice the emphasis on me me me) That person who believes me when I say I want a drastic change. Who also believes me when I say that I cannot round-brush blow dry my hair. (seriously, I will hit myself in the face with either the brush or the blow dryer or both) And someone who gets that my hair is sometimes curly, sometimes straight and sometimes straight-and-curly. I think I have finally found that person.

She cut off ten to twelve inches. I was able to donate to the locks of love! I have layers! I have bounce! It frames my face! It's awesome! I also have her business card and I forbid her to leave Austin. FORDBID!

The salon I went to is part of a spa a few blocks from where I work downtown. Which means I walked there to get my hair cut at lunch on Friday. (which means I also called my boss to come pick me up because it started to POUR rain as soon as it was time for me to walk back with my freshly coiffed hair. have I mentioned what a great boss i have?) I have come a long way concerning the spas. I used to feel very awkward, out-of-place and uncomfortable in them. I always felt like people were really snobby and judging me. Like they all thought I didn't belong there because I'm not as "high-class" as them. I kind of felt like there were things I was expected to know that I didn't know. I felt intimidated by the receptionist because she obviously knew how to round-brush blow dry and apply makeup and dress. I have since worked through this inadequacy complex. I realized this by the fact that I now critique spas and salons. I now have standards that they sometimes don't meet. For instance, the spa I went to to get my hair cut, they didn't give me a poncho/wrap thing to change into. They made me wear my work clothes to get my hair cut (the horror!). For some reason, the fact that I felt this way made me feel as though I'd finally conquered my fears of spas and salons. I no longer feel inadequate. I no longer feel awkward. I realize now that no one thought of me as a backwards, not-as-good-as-them person; that was how I thought of myself. And I don't anymore. Yeah for growth! And really awesome haircuts!

Wednesday, March 11

Winter, the sequel

It was 82 degrees two days ago. It's now 42 degrees. Chilly for these parts. Why can't winter end? I was all ready to start planting. Oh well, I knew we had at least one more good cold snap before Winter is over. And the rain is nice.

Husband and I can't decide if we want to spend money redoing this house or if we want to sell. I really want the sort of house where the kitchen sink looks over the living area. There is no way we can remodel this house to do that. My sink is behind my chimney. However, I don't think I can have toddlers on this carpet. It's gross, nasty carpet. I want new carpet upstairs and saltillo tile downstairs. Even if we were to lay all that tile ourselves, that's still a pricey venture. And it would involve removing the ceramic tile that is in parts of the downstairs now. And then what if we move?

I peed on another digital test this morning. Negative. And if you think I didn't use my little "trimming" scissors to crack open those digi tests (both of them!) so that I could look for faint lines, then you, my friend, would be wrong. I totally did. There were no lines. (correction: there are lines, but only the one, is-this-even-working, line. the strips work like the ones you pee on with the two lines) They do have batteries in them which I am determined to repurpose.

My next project is going to be making my own laundry detergent. I've looked into doing this before for the cost saving aspect; but now I'm interested in the additional lessening-of-chemicals-on-my-body aspect. It's very cheap to do, so if it doesn't work, no biggie.

Tuesday, March 10

Do these look bigger to you?

And of course, I'm talking about my breasts. Again.

They have been slightly slightly bigger and slightly slightly tender for about a week. Ever since I ovulated (yeah!) actually. I keep telling myself that this has all happened before. And it has. And I wasn't pregnant. And it's possible I'm just gaining weight. I have a tendency to eat as though I'm pregnant.

I pee on another stick tomorrow morning. I will be 13dpo.

Prayers, please.

Sunday, March 8

It's late and I hate servers (super boring work post)

Sooooooo. The upgrade this weekend. It did not go so well. In fact, it pratically hasn't gone at all. We started with the backup server and the initial testing did not go well. I was up until 2 a.m. last night restoring the backup server so that we could retry today.

We retried today. It worked more than it did yesterday; but not 100%. Now I'm accepting the risk of not having a backup server so that super-helpful vendor support guy can work with software company to fix.

There were some dicey moments along the way. Like last night when I thought I'd figured out why it wasn't working, redid the install without super-helpful vendor support guy (without shutting down the primary, functioning server) and then freaked out because I thought I had somehow inadvertently broken our only functioning server. I literally called my boss and told him that I had fracked (I didn't say frack) everything up and it was all my fault. He told me to wait for the server to reset. Everything was fine. Then he told me to stop working on it, do the server restore and to go sleep. I have such an awesome boss.

Even though I did all the testing I know how to do to make sure our primary server is still happy and functioning, I still need to check with our Romanian call center to make sure they are able to take calls when they come online at 9 a.m. their time. They are eight hours ahead right? I only have to stay up until 1 a.m., right? um, right? WRONG! They don't care about our time change. They are now only seven hours ahead and I have to be awake and on the computer at 2 a.m. As an aside, if you ever need to know the time somewhere other than where you are, or even where you are, www.worldtimeserver.com is awesome. I like. So many times during my day I need to know what time it is in Aukland, NZ and is that the same time as in Sydney or Bombay?

A totally irrelevant, non-problem

I took another test this morning. Not Pregnant. I felt that the digital test was laughing at me. I hate those, but I can't obsess over evaporation lines the next morning.

I know it's still early. I don't test again until Wednesday morning and Husband has hidden the one remaining test from me. At my request.

So here's my non-problem. Husband is a third, as in Husband the third, as in his Dad is Husband Jr. (not that he's my third husband). Husband would really like our first baby boy (I'm not even pregnant!) to be Husband the fourth. I don't so much.

I did at one time, but that's changed. After talking to his mom and finding out that she wishes she hadn't named Husband his name. And then talking to my father-in-law and his attitude of not caring about it, has all led me to reconsider my initial acquiescence to the fourth. Here are some things to consider:

1. Husband goes by Trey, a common nickname for the thirds, around his family, and his real name around his friends. He told me when we were dating that only his family called him Trey so I was to call him his real name. So I did. And that is who he is to me now. This was his critical mistake. He should've asked me to call him Trey.

1.5. I think insisting that your son is named after you is a tad narcissistic. Okay, not a tad, a LOT.

2. I don't want to call my husband and son the same name. I don't want the name that I sometimes say in fits of passion to be the same name I use to refer to my son. Anyone agree? Can I get an amen?

3. There ARE. NO. GOOD. nicknames for the fourth or for Husband's real name. And the middle name is eastern-European weird.

My proposed solution is to keep the middle name, and use a different first name. I even like the name of his great-grandfather. Husband just looks thoughtful and sad when I bring up my brilliant and fair solution.

Readership, weigh in. Both of you.

Saturday, March 7

Evaporation lines and my stupidity

I received some very good advice from HW that went along the lines of "don't pee on sticks! It's too early! and sticks are $$$$!". Which is sage and sound advice. And I agreed with her on all points. I then peed on three sticks. THREE.

The first test was used (sounds better than peed on, doesn't it?)(and I mean I used the test, not that it was a used test) Thursday evening. *smack* I was only 7 or 8 days past ovulation.

Mistake number 2: I looked at the test the next morning. I've done this several times. I'm an old pro at digging tests out of the trash can to re-evaluate them and look at them under a brighter light. I've propped a used test up on the toilet tank as a reminder that I'm not pregnant and I should stop peeing on sticks, already. In the year and a half that I've partaken in this obsessive, irrational behavior, I've never ever seen any hint of a possible positive line. EVER. NOT ONCE. Until Friday morning, that is. I then read about evaporation lines and how they can make a test look positive when in fact it is not. Curse them!

Mistake number 3: I peed on another test, naturally. During the appropriate time frame in which to observe results, nothing. Negative. Meh. Fine.

Mistake number 4: I looked at this test when I got home from work. and lo! there was a darker, faint line. Way darker than how the evaporation lines were described. It was a line that would actually show up in a picture. But again. After the prescribed time for reading the test. But, still, this has never happened.

Mistake number 5: Buying more tests.

Mistake number 6: Doing a test Friday night (yes, that's two in one day). You see, the previous two tests were generic HEB brand tests. Clearly they are inferior. I'll try a fancy EPT test. It was negative.

Mistake number 7: Looking at that test this morning. Again. a line.

Why does the Universe mock me?

Thursday, March 5

What to write, what to write

I always seem to know what I should blog about when I'm going to sleep, but can't ever remember what it was during the day. I know I have some really interesting topics floating around in my head. But they are elusive.

I'm going to cook for a friend of mine who just had a baby this Friday. I mean tomorrow. *ack* Why do I have such poor time management skills? I blame public schools; but Husband keeps telling me I can't blame public schools for everything. At which point I tell him that, in fact, I can blame public schools for everything, I just wouldn't be exactly right. But I would be partially right. School was never. ever. a challenge for me. It was an exercise in boredom management, not time management.

Anyway, I think I'll side step that bitter tirade and save it for another day.

Let's talk about work. I'm learning how to configure a router! That makes me super-geek! This is why I took this job: so that I'd have the opportunities to learn things that I was never in a million years going to learn where I was. This will all make me more employable and *hopefully* more payable. I'm starting to think about bouncing out of here around the end of Summer but I'm not sure yet. I'm going to keep an eye on the job market.

Part of me is thinking that if we wait another year to get pregnant (and by "wait" I mean we just don't get pregnant) then we could possibly find a new house or at least pull up all the icky carpet and put down saltillo tile. I'm torn on whether we should move or fix the house we've got. It's not a bad house. It does have a few problems. and possibly a cracked foundation. *shudder* I don't want to talk about this anymore. I'd like to continue ignoring the possibly cracked foundation.

I'm looking forward to the weekend, even though I will be working Saturday night. I'm upgrading the software for our entire call center. (trying not to hyperventilate) Wish me luck!

Wednesday, March 4

TTC: Update

Temp was still high this morning.

That thermometer is so broken.

Or I ovulated.

I'm resisting the urge to pee on sticks. I estimate that I am 6dpo. Or the thermometer is broken.

Tuesday, March 3

Things to learn and things to hope for

Apparently I need to learn the whole "save as draft and post on the appropriate day" part of blogging. I also *still* need to learn my right from my left.

My temperature has jumped. (This indicates that I've ovulated). I had a high temp last week, but I thought it was a fluke. Then I couldn't take me temp for two days. Then I had another high temp. Which I also thought was a fluke. Or maybe it was because I had slept with my super sexy sweat pants on. Well, this morning, with no pants on at all, another high temp. This is bizarre to me. I'm actually more inclined to think that my thermometer is broken than to think that my body actually ovulated on day 13. But I'm hopeful. And I haven't felt hopeful for some time.

Monday, March 2

Tuesday Tips

Now it's time for some useful household tips from Spinner. Prepare yourselves for sheer brilliance.
  1. IF you have a shelf above your washing machine, AND
    IF you use the kind of liquid soap that lies on it's side and dispenses like those lemonade jars people have at picnics AND
    IF your dispenser sometimes drips a little before you can get the dispensing cup back on and makes spots on your dryer which you hate and make you want to scream, THEN
    here's my tip: Move the laundry soap dispenser so that it will drip into your washing machine.

    It took me years to figure this out. And then I didn't really figure it out. Husband came into the garage while I was having a meltdown because there were more of those drip spots and they had dripped on some clean laundry, too. I explained the situation and he calmly moved the laundry soap a foot to the left, ensuring all drips will go into the washing machine will I'm pouring in the detergent and then rinsing the cup in the water for only a few minutes. I once again felt safe and secure in the universe.

  2. Pigtails are appropriate on a 31 year-old woman. Because I say so.
    (The practical aspect to pigtails is that a ponytail will make a lump on the back of my head. This lump is very uncomfortable when I'm driving and put my head against my headrest. Pigtails part the hair in the back, leaving a flat surface.)

Weather! How could you do this to me? I thought we were friends! And other Monday morning angst.

Last week the weather was bee u tee full. It was so spring-is-in-the-air. I was so excited about opening up the windows Saturday morning, going to the farmers' market and *not* freezing, planting some plants, etc. Instead, Saturday was very very cold. And super windy. The farmers' market trip was short and cold.

I don't mind cold while I'm working. Because I'm inside all. day. long. With no windows. Where we have a controlled climate. But to make it so gorgeous outside while I have to stay in my hole and work, then turn around and make it sooo cold when I can go out, it's just mean.

That is Texas weather for you. It is a manic depressive and can change in the blink of an eye. I mean, we had snow on Easter two years ago. SNOW! EASTER!

Sunday, March 1

Aaaacghgh! It's almost Monday.

And we've already covered how I feel about Monday.

Anyway.

I'd like to warn everyone that I've been reading a lot of Amalah who writes with a very snarky, bitter-alcoholic-sailor tone. (I do sensor it in my mind. Don't ask me how, I don't want to get into it.) I tend to write in a similar tone to what I've been reading. I'm not original and have never claimed to be.

Today started with church and ended with church. Presbyterian in the morning, Catholic in the evening. Church was good. I needed church. A good friend of ours also invited us over for clam spaghetti. I was apprehensive, but was looking forward to giving it a try. After all, if I like this recipe, then I have a shellfish recipe that I can make. and like. and will eat. I did like it and will try to make it myself sometime soon.

I've gotten exactly 1.3 loads of laundry done this weekend. Only 789,763,233.7 to go! And of the 1.3 loads that I've "done," none of it has been put away. Spinner = laundry fail.

I also got to attend the second first birthday party for my youngest godson. That was very enjoyable except that his mommy has a green thumb and a sunny yard. I can't decide which I'm most jealous of, the fact that she has a child or the fact that she can grow beautiful plants. I would *really* like to be able to grow things. and have a child.

On an unrelated note, I've completely convinced a guy at work that I want to get pregnant mostly to increase the size of my feet because I have some really cute shoes that are just a little too big. Tech guys make this sort of thing soooo easy. Especially if they are Unix Tech guys. I will so sudo control their feeble, shell command minds. Mwa ha ha.